But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
