I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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