I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
