I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize