well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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