do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize