hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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