She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize