since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
