We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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