worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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