What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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