Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
