But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
