Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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