just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
