you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
