This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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