all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
