That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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