Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
there was a trapeze. enough said
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
