We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
