and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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