It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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