Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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