glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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