Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
