The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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