Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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