And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize