He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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