Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
