Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
