So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
