And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
