i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
