Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
