Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Randomize
