So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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