Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
