just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize