did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Randomize
