So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
