why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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