The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
