mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
We left an ass print on the piano.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm really busy with my period
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