God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
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