3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
