I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
