Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Randomize
