How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
